Another weird thing is I usually hate rap music but for the last three or four days I've been listening to a lot of it. I especially am enjoying Eminem, his old stuff its super angry.
See, its all super chill.
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
Its all good
I know I'm stressed when I go to bed at 2:30 am and wake up at 7:40 am on my day off. Its weird, I think a lot of it is repressed because I'm really chill right now. I'm sitting in my favorite table at Starbucks drinking my vanilla latte. Every now and again a twinge of panic will hit but to be so stressed I am remaining pretty calm. I even did Yoga this morning for like an hour.
Monday, May 12, 2014
Life Update
I listen to too much sad music...
In the last two years the genre of music I listen to has changed. I used to listen to the radio and whatever music I had uploaded from CD's to my computer while in high school. Last year my Mac book crashed and I haven't gotten around to transferring my music from my external hard drive to my new laptop. I am now the reluctant owner of a windows laptop I bought from my mom because she never used it. Also I have never had so much free time in my life so I have had a good time discovering artists. I don't know if I have a favorite genre I just like to listen to songs that make me feel something. Has anyone else randomly found a song that perfectly expresses a moment or a feeling you can't quite put into words of your own? Its like the music has reached into your soul and stirred it up. (Am I crazy?) According to the 17 teenagers I listen to too much weird/sad stuff. To bad I don't care...too much.
Book Reading
I've been jumping between like four books recently "Bossy Pants" by Tina Fey, "Sin and Syntax" by I forgot her name, "Shadow Puppets" by Orson Scott Card, and "Bird by Bird" by Anne Lamott. I ordered Bird by Bird like 3 weeks ago when I was in Orlando and a friend let me borrow it for a couple of days. I had been waiting and waiting and it finally came this Monday. I have been reading it on and off all day long. I really like her style of writing. This last chapter was titled "Shitty first drafts" even famous authors have to start somewhere! I'm so glad I decided to start reading books on writing. I don't know how long I have spent feeling this desire to write but not having enough confidence to actually to put forth any effort. Reading is something I have enjoyed my entire life and now I think I'm learning slowly, very slowly that someday if I continue to practice and put forth some sort of effort someday, someday I'm going to write something that I really like and that I won't be scared to share with others. Oh! Another thing she says is that its not being published that's most important, its the process. I'm going to continue to work on those shitty first drafts until I find something that I like.
Job Hunting
Today I went on to Florida Hospitals website and I have applied for 44 jobs there. That is cray! After I looked that up and was about to fall into despair I got a call from someone at Florida Hospital they had more questions about a potential job, yeah! I don't think I will get it (honestly I don't even know if I want it) but its nice to know that someone actually is looking at my resume. In the last week I've gotten one phone call and one email with further inquiries to jobs I have applied too. I'm not giving up just yet.
Dad.
It feels like life rolls along at an uneventful pace and than all this stress, worry, and emotional turmoil comes at once. That is what has happened to me in the last few weeks, things have just kinda piled up and it has been hard.
My Dad has been sick for a couple of months and three weeks ago he went out to visit family in Cali. A few weeks ago my Mom called me and told me that my dad was in the hospital out there and it was pretty bad. He has kidney failure. I don't really know what else to say about it, my feelings are all jumbled up and I don't know how to express them right now. I'm glad that my Dad is still alive.
In the last two years the genre of music I listen to has changed. I used to listen to the radio and whatever music I had uploaded from CD's to my computer while in high school. Last year my Mac book crashed and I haven't gotten around to transferring my music from my external hard drive to my new laptop. I am now the reluctant owner of a windows laptop I bought from my mom because she never used it. Also I have never had so much free time in my life so I have had a good time discovering artists. I don't know if I have a favorite genre I just like to listen to songs that make me feel something. Has anyone else randomly found a song that perfectly expresses a moment or a feeling you can't quite put into words of your own? Its like the music has reached into your soul and stirred it up. (Am I crazy?) According to the 17 teenagers I listen to too much weird/sad stuff. To bad I don't care...too much.
Book Reading
I've been jumping between like four books recently "Bossy Pants" by Tina Fey, "Sin and Syntax" by I forgot her name, "Shadow Puppets" by Orson Scott Card, and "Bird by Bird" by Anne Lamott. I ordered Bird by Bird like 3 weeks ago when I was in Orlando and a friend let me borrow it for a couple of days. I had been waiting and waiting and it finally came this Monday. I have been reading it on and off all day long. I really like her style of writing. This last chapter was titled "Shitty first drafts" even famous authors have to start somewhere! I'm so glad I decided to start reading books on writing. I don't know how long I have spent feeling this desire to write but not having enough confidence to actually to put forth any effort. Reading is something I have enjoyed my entire life and now I think I'm learning slowly, very slowly that someday if I continue to practice and put forth some sort of effort someday, someday I'm going to write something that I really like and that I won't be scared to share with others. Oh! Another thing she says is that its not being published that's most important, its the process. I'm going to continue to work on those shitty first drafts until I find something that I like.
Job Hunting
Today I went on to Florida Hospitals website and I have applied for 44 jobs there. That is cray! After I looked that up and was about to fall into despair I got a call from someone at Florida Hospital they had more questions about a potential job, yeah! I don't think I will get it (honestly I don't even know if I want it) but its nice to know that someone actually is looking at my resume. In the last week I've gotten one phone call and one email with further inquiries to jobs I have applied too. I'm not giving up just yet.
Dad.
It feels like life rolls along at an uneventful pace and than all this stress, worry, and emotional turmoil comes at once. That is what has happened to me in the last few weeks, things have just kinda piled up and it has been hard.
My Dad has been sick for a couple of months and three weeks ago he went out to visit family in Cali. A few weeks ago my Mom called me and told me that my dad was in the hospital out there and it was pretty bad. He has kidney failure. I don't really know what else to say about it, my feelings are all jumbled up and I don't know how to express them right now. I'm glad that my Dad is still alive.
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